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I was born
with a plastic beach shovel in
my mouth.
Yep – I’m a
certifiable beach bum, through
and through, born and raised –
I’m even getting married
on a Cape May beach next year.
Just the smell of Coppertone
rouses up nostalgia and I’m 8
years old again, covered from
head to toe in sand, digging up
sand crabs, body surfing from
the earliest my parents could
get me to the beach (usually 9AM). And we'd stay until 4
in the afternoon.
Now that's a work day I can live
with. I can still remember
that water logged feeling I
would have in my chest as I
scrunched up my tight, sunburned
skin once the cold water of the
hose hit me. And then the nap
that always followed shortly
after, no matter how many times
I said, “I’m not sleepy, I’m not
sleepy attt aaaalllll (yaaaaaaaaawwwwwnnnnnnn).
Hmmm…a nap
right now sounds so good.
But instead I'm to going to the beach to tell
you what you'll need when going to
a Cape May beach. What
complaints could a beach bum
have about that? I would never
pass a day up at the beach –
ever. But fearing the members of
the Beach Bum Cult might hear
this, I’ll whisper it: “I do
not want to go to the beach
today”.
It’s the
HEAT. The forecast says it is
89 but it feels like 94 (100 is
more like it) with 74% humidity
and the wind factor is N 7. No
sea breeze. No relief.
Seven?
Must’ve been registered from the
opening of a door because
there’s no wind out here!
 Obviously,
I’ll need something cold to
drink before I go (hydration is
essential) and get my beach bag
from my car. Certifiable Beach
Bums are always prepared.
I stop for a
cold iced tea and go to my car
to get my beach bag fully
equipped with a frozen bottle of
ice water (I never go to
the beach without it!), blanket,
towel, change of clothes, some
deodorant (never hurts!), book
(Secret Life of Bees by Susan
Monk Kidd), plenty of SPF
lotions in all degrees and, a
must-have for all beachgoers, my
beach tag (seasonal). It’s more
than a beach bag. It’s a
survival kit. On a day like
today, I’ll need a kit to
survive this brutal heat.
And then it
dawns on me, what do other
people pack in their beach bags
to survive a day like today? I
make a note that ONCE I’ve
cooled off in the water, I’ll
ask around and find out.
I feel like
I’m preparing for the
Decathlon. I've eaten a good lunch,
I’ve had plenty to drink, and
feel pretty good. A quick
change, lathering of SPF 30, and
I’m all set for the beach. Oh!
Money! I’ll be renting a chair
and maybe an umbrella….$20?
Will that cover it? I’ll just
bring my wallet and leave it in
the bag.
I’m close
enough that I can walk to the
beach and as I head down Jackson
Street, I see some beachgoers
running to their cars to deposit
money in the meters. From May 1
to October 31, every day, from
10:00 AM to 10:00 PM, all meters
are 25 cents per twenty minutes
and only accept
quarters. So if you drive,
aside from blocking traffic
while pulling up next to Cape
May’s promenade while you unload
your spouse, offspring, and
beach paraphernalia and you
drive off to find that elusive
parking spot ALWAYS bring
quarters with you to the beach
to feed the meter.
God, it’s hot
out here. I’m not
“perspiring,"
I’m sweating! My
shirt is sticking to my back –
in the shade!
I cross the
street toward the Promenade
where I see the new Welcome to
Cape May Beach sign. As I get
closer, I see at the bottom, in
smaller print “A copy of our
beach rules are available from
any beach tag official,
lifeguard, or City Hall”.
Posted right
next to the Welcome sign are
Beach Tag prices. I have a
seasonal pass ($25) but I stop
to see what the prices are for
day trippers ($4), 3 day ($9),
weekly,($13 and note these are
valid from Saturday to
Saturday), and seasonal passes
are $25 (if purchased before
April 1, they're only $15).
The beach tag
person haltingly says “hello” as
she quickly glances me over for
a tag and then smiles when she
sees it. She’s smart sitting
under that umbrella today, I
think to myself. I wonder how
much they cost. I wonder, where
is the breeze that might help
dry the hair that is now
sticking to the back of my neck
as I grab a pony tail holder and
pull it all up.
 The sand
isn’t as hot as I thought it
would be, but I still leave my
flip flops on as I walk over to
Justin. Justin is the young man
selling chairs, umbrellas, beach
boxes, tents, water, soda, and
iced tea on the beach. He
looks pretty cool sitting under
three green umbrellas. All
umbrellas are color coded
according to their respective
beaches. “How much for an
umbrella?” I ask.
"Ten
dollars."
I inquire
about chairs ($5), boogie boards
($13), drinks ($1.50), beach
boxes ($8 daily, $50 monthly,
$360 seasonal), and tents ($13
daily, $70 weekly, $200 monthly,
and $525 seasonal). If you get
to the beach early in the
morning, Justin is usually
already there
- before 10 AM and starts
 collecting his umbrellas around
4:15. It’s already going on 3
o’clock so I opt not to rent an
umbrella and instead find a spot
to drop my bag and belongings
and make a beeline for the
water.
I swear I
heard sizzling as the water hit
my skin. I sank into the water
lying there for a good while,
just floating with the tide.
THIS was the perfect anecdote to
a blazing hot day. After a half
hour or so, I reluctantly
decided to get out of the water.
Doing my
version of Bo Derek’s “10” -
which is more like a “3" - I make
a dash for the blanket, grab my
towel, and reach in my beach bag
to grab my ice water and …where
is it? Oh this can’t be. OH MY
GOD! I forgot my water!! I
panic and look around nervously
that others have caught on to my
ill equipped beach bag and are
already starting to whisper,
“How could she?” and “Did you
see what she did?”. Well, no
need to panic really, I’ll just
go up to Justin and buy some –
help isn’t far away! Then I
wonder what did all these other
beachgoers pack in their beach
bags to survive a hot day like
today on the beach.
“What’s in
your beach bag?”
Jackie and
Donna, locals of Cape May, are
sitting by the jetty with their
families. These women came
well prepared. Jackie has a
book, cell phone, money, her
beach tag, sunscreen, towel, and
Travel Scrabble. Her friend,
Donna, has a towel, an orange
ball, a book and a cosmetic bag
with bug repellent, anti-itch
crème, antibiotic cream, band
aids, and lipstick. A girl’s gotta look her best in this
heat.
My bathing
suit is already dry as I walk
over to Rich, also a Cape May
local, sitting
 on his blanket
with a big white beach bag
behind him. He takes his bag
and pulls out: suntan lotion,
cell phone, his wife’s purse,
her hat, his wallet, his shirt,
his inhaler, more lotion, baby
oil, book, pair of glasses, and
cigarettes. Cigarettes? But
Rich doesn’t smoke and neither
does his wife….uh oh.
Moving on
then, I ask Rich’s friend, Mike,
from Jenkintown what’s in his
beach bag. He has a beeper, a
cell phone, a newspaper, sun
hat, glasses, car keys, money, a
variety of lotions and
sunscreens, a radio, and Rich’s
wife’s necklace and her
sunglasses.
“Her stuff is
everywhere. I’m still wondering
about those cigarettes” ponders
Rich. “She doesn’t smoke”.
WOW!
Something tells me Rich’s wife
is going to be feeling a
different kind of heat when she
returns to the blanket.
I walk over
to 3 families sitting together
under umbrellas. Surely with
babies and toddlers they’ll have
different things in their bags.
Cynthia, Andrew, and Olivia are
from Texas; Tim, Tim, and
Madeline are from Pennsylvania;
and Mike and Stella are from
Florida and collectively they
have: sunscreen, towels, toys,
lots of hats, books (that they
never have the chance to read),
diapers, wipes, newspapers, and
a cooler with juice boxes,
peanut butter and jelly
sandwiches, and cheese
sandwiches.
More like
grilled cheese. Why aren’t
these people in the water?
Meg’s family,
from West Cape May, looked like
they just got out of the water.
Meg had a hat, book and knitting
in her bag. Her son Kevin
brought a bag with only a towel
in it, her daughter, Rebecca,
was on her cell phone, and her
daughter Gretchen had water and
lotion in hers.
Water…..ahhh,
water. I miss my ice water! I
think the wind factor went from
7 to 0.
 Sharon, from
Delran, NJ, is next and she has
“everything” in her beach bag.
She has a kite, her daughter’s
Hello Kitty visor, lotion,
pretzels, sunglasses, camera,
“O” magazine, crackers, baby
powder and tissues.
ONE more
family and then back to the
water! Cussol, from Montreal is
sitting under a tent as her 10
year-old son lies sleeping next
to her. She whispers that she
has a football, towels, camera,
book, tissues and her son’s
goggles. Her son starts to stir
and I’m ready to take his place
on the blanket for a nap myself.
My body is
limp and I see the haze above
the water and dream of air
conditioning – didn’t anyone
bring that? Eh, no matter as I
head on back for another cool
dip.
In the water
again...... hhhisssssss.
I got to
the beach today – a beach bum
through and through! And if I
can, I'll come back tomorrow and
again and again. Maybe I'll see
you there!
Let's review...
For
a successful, stress-free day at
the beach in Cape May here are
some helpful tips:
-
Beach tags – no tag, no
beach!
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We’re watching you! Swim
while lifeguards are on duty
(10 AM – 5 PM)
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If you don’t have it, you
can rent it – umbrellas,
tents, chairs, etc.
-
Feed your meters – bring
plenty of quarters with
you.
-
Beach bags/Survival kits –
pack accordingly but don’t
fret, help is nearby for
anything forgotten at home.
-
Just because the sky’s blue
doesn’t mean you won’t
burn! Hazy days, blue
skies, sunburn isn’t picky
so don’t forget the
sunscreen!
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